Category Archives: Humor

A dream about an oreo cookie: (actually two oreos)

So many dreams, so little time
I have all types of dreams, and took up the past time of analyzing my dreams. There are many basic dream symbols which you can learn from books. Some items in dreams symbolize parts of your life or emotions while others just are what they are. If you dream about your back yard, basement or back door, that relates to your subconscious in some way. If you dream about gasoline that represents an explosive situation. Different foods have vastly different meanings ranging from fulfillment, sexuality and comfort. But, Oreos are not in the dream dictionary, so what did my dream mean?

I had a dream that there were two huge Oreo cookies back to back.
I was just looking at these cookies hovering in air. I woke up and thought about the dream I had just had. What was the deeper meaning in this dream? What did these Oreo cookies represent — after all in dreams, each symbol has to symbolize something, unless it symbolizes itself which is also possible. Keep in mind that some dream symbols have standardized meanings while other symbols could be more personalized or have different meanings in different dreams. Dreams are created by your subconscious which plays by its own rules, not the rules of your dream dictionary.

I didn’t have time to analyze this dream
Nor did I have time to ask my psychic. The next day I decided to have steak for dinner. My acupuncturist says I need to have a few ounces of rare red meat every two or three weeks to keep my red blood cell count up. So, I do exactly that. I will meander down to Wood Ranch and get their Filet Mignon which is very reasonably priced. I always enjoy myself when I am at their location in The Grove in Los Angeles. They have a lively crowd and fun servers. Their steaks are my favorite, but not that expensive. I was hungry that day. I had worked too much, and eaten too little. So, I munched on my rolls, and sipped on my wine. I wolfed down my filet, but felt an emptiness inside. This didn’t fulfill me. I needed something more…

WAITER: “Would you like to see the dessert menu?”
ME: “Funny you should mention that…”

I glanced at the menu and noticed their crushed Oreo cookie encrusted vanilla ice cream. It is a huge sphere of vanilla ice cream with crushed Oreo cookie (without the filling) embedded on the outside of the vanilla sphere. I figured that would satisfy my needs. There was a choice of raspberry syrup or chocolate. I asked for mostly chocolate with a touch of raspberry. That turned out perfectly. I chatted with the waiter as I forged my way into this humongous Oreo encrusted snowball that mitigated my avalanche of hunger.

I’d like to compose a blog about innovative and unusual desserts and you can bet that this glob of Oreo madness will top the list along with tequila tortilla lime brittle and mousse balls.

Until next time!

The Angry Thai – a restaurant with a huge angry Buddha

Some bored restauranteurs got together to discuss some ideas. They were tired with the same old restaurants, the nice service, the outfits, the predictable menus, etc. They wanted to do something different, but what? One guy thought of the idea of doing underwater dining, but that has already been done in some foreign country. Another thought of a simulated outer space experience, but that was too costly and complicated. Finally, after hours of brainstorming Ryan came up with the idea of a Thai restaurant where everyone was angry. The other guys were not sure if the idea would fly. It would go either way. People might like the idea because it was different, or they might be scared off. The main point was that the restaurant would be an experience that you would not forget.

So, they built a restaurant with a huge angry Buddha. This Buddha got so upset, that steam would come out of its ears when it got mad. Not only that, but the floor, windows, and porcelain would start to rattle every time the Buddha got mad. At first this was fun. But, little did they know that the idea would get out of hand.

The next hurdle was to find staff. Thai people are generally very congenial and nice. It is very rare that you meet an angry Thai person. Even if they are angry, they smile and pretend to be happy, as that is their culture. I only met an angry Thai person once. She was very rude. The other people are her work outcasted her and basically threw her out. It is socially not acceptable to be angry with Thais (or Indians) for that matter. You’ll get outcasted faster than you can say Rad Na if you are!

Finally, after lots of looking around, they found some actors and actresses who were good at acting angry, but no too angry. This was good, because they didn’t want to have situations that were out of control. They put together a menu, found a few good chefs, and they were open for business.

HOSTESS: “Sawat di kaaaaaa… Welcome to the Angry Thai, is there anything I can do to make your stay more angry?”

CUSTOMER: “Um, we heard you had a very good Thai style angry pork sandwich.”

HOSTESS: “Yaaaa, very angry-la. It has many chili peppers in it — make you very angry very fast. You like…”

CUSTOMER: “Sounds great. Can you recommend anything else?”

HOSTESS: “Try our salads, very spicy too. Not sate salad — too agreeable. Try spicy beef salad with lemongrass, lime and chilis. Guaranteed to make you mad after your first bite. Have a seat, your server will be with you.”

SERVER: “Welcome to the angry Thai, I’m Nelson, and I’m angry.”

CUSTOMER: “Nice to meet you Nelson.”

SERVER: “No, not nice. I am not nice — I am angry, and meeting me is not nice.”

CUSTOMER: “Got it. We are interested in the papaya salad.”

SERVER: “Okay, but not angry. To compensate, I can step on your toe.”

CUSTOMER: “Okay, just don’t step too hard. By the way, that is a very nice Buddha you have over there.”

SERVER: “You must never speak ill of the Buddha — he will get very very angry! And terrible things will happen…”

CUSTOMER: “I thought that the Buddha was enlightened and happy, and spread peace throughout the world.”

SERVER: “You’ve got the wrong Buddha lady. Our Buddha is not like that. He gets mad!”

CUSTOMER: “I don’t believe that.” (speaking to the Buddha) “Hey Buddha, what’s the secret to enlightenment?”

SERVER: “Oh no, you must not do that…”

HOSTESS: “How is everything? Is everybody angry yet?”

CUSTOMER: “No, I just asked the Buddha a question.”

HOSTESS: “Oh no, don’t do that. He get very angry. Don’t play game with our Buddha. He not like other Buddha.”

CUSTOMER: “I don’t believe that.” (speaking to the Buddha) “Hey Buddha, how come you meditate all the time, why don’t you get a girlfriend.”

GUY AT NEXT TABLE: “Seriously, you are pushing it. That Buddha has a reputation. The whole place will start shaking if you make him mad.

CUSTOMER: “That’s a bunch of BS. And besides. I can get exactly the same Buddha for less than half what you paid on Buddhas4less.com.”

Suddenly, the entire restaurant started shaking. The chinaware was clanging, the pots were banging, the floor was shaking, and steam was coming out from the Buddha’s ears.

HOSTESS: “Oh no, you made the Buddha mad. See what you did?”

CUSTOMER: “I thought that was the whole point of coming here — to have an angry experience…”

HOSTESS: “Yes, getting mad is okay, just don’t make the Buddha mad — when he get mad, he get very very angry. Terrible things will happen.”

The customers enjoyed their angry Thai food and went home feeling satisfied. They were even more satisfied that they upset the Buddha, and regarded making him mad as a mark of achievement. Several weeks later something much more serious happened. A family with children came to the restaurant. The children taunted the Buddha and kept poking him and asking him why he was so angry. The Buddha got so angry that the whole restaurant shook, but much more seriously than before. Instead of a light tremor, it was more like an 8.7. The paintings fell off the wall, the windows started to break, the walls started to cave in. Everyone rushed for the door and barely escaped with their lives. The Buddha got so angry that the entire neighborhood shook until no building was standing for two blocks. The entire area was reduced to rubble. When the clean up crew came, the only object that was still intact was the golden angry Buddha. Word on the street was that the angry Buddha was angry because it was inhabited by an angry spirit of a disgruntled monk from Burma whose community turned on him and kicked him out of the monastery.

But, the angry Buddha was different now. He usually had a scowl and sharply angled eyebrows. The Buddha’s physical appearance had changed. Now, he was content and relieved, and anyone who looked at him could tell. The Buddha was smiling. Perhaps a different spirit was inside of this golden Buddha now. A happy spirit. What an irony.

And that is the tale of the Angry Buddha at the Angry Thai Restaurant.
Have an angry rest of your day!
The end!

What would a fake Thailand be like?

Welcome to Clip-on Thai Land

I have never been to real Thailand, but I thought it would be amusing to write a travelogue about fake Thailand. Almost everything in fake Thailand is fake, hence the name — fake Thailand.

Plexiglass noodles & other cuisine
If you order glass noodles with chicken, you’ll get chicken was made out of a tofu substitute which they pan fry with some plexiglass noodles. I’ve heard of artificial meat, but I draw the line at fake glass noodles.

Pad-Lhai
The pad Thai would be missing all of the critical ingredients except for noodles. No ground peanuts, no spicy sauce, no shredded carrots, and no lime. This fraudulent excuse for a noodle dish would be one big lie!

Rad-Not
Another sham of an imitation of a real noodle dish. This dish simply would not be Rad-na. It would have wide noodles, but no gravy, pepper, spices, or broccoli. It would be Rad-Not!

Drunken Noodles
The drunken noodles are cooked on a hot rock like Mongolian BBQ. So, they’re stoned, not drunk.

Other Dishes
You would be served non-adhesive mango sticky rice cooked on non-stick pan after you finished your egg rolls served with a something’s fishy sauce.

Faux-ket
The hill tribes lived on a plain, and then used a movie set of hills in the background. How disappointing. But, they did have real looking costumes and embroidery at least. So, not everything was fake. All of the beach lovers headed over to Faux-Ket to stay at a resort next to the beach.

Bangcrock
In the large cities, there would be fake prostitutes with fake AIDS. What a concept. I’m not sure how they would create a fake AIDS, but this is a fantasy article, so there would be a way.

Temples
The main Buddhist temple in Bangkok had a really large TV screen showing the Buddha instead of having a huge Buddha statue like normal temples. Virtual Buddhas — What will they think of next? They even had imitation monks at the temple. The monks were government officials wearing Buddhist robes who were pretending to meditate.

Fake degrees
In real Thailand, you can get a fake pilot’s license for 20 Baht. In fake Thailand, you can also get a fake degree or license, however the money would also be fake.

Sham elections
In real Thailand there are sham elections. But, in fake Thailand there would be sham sham elections if there can be such a thing — not to mention a fake coup.

Culinary terms would adapt as well
Yellow curry duck would become Quack Massuman. And fake Vietnamese noodles would be Pho’-ny, or faux pho’.

In any case, I’ve heard that the real Thailand has nice people, great beaches, and amazing food. But, this fake Thailand… Hmmm. I’m not so sure about it.

Beam me up biscotti

I often tell jokes. Sometimes they are not that funny. To craft a good joke, you have to work at it, and weed out the mediocre jokes. You also have to know your audience. There is a lot that goes into it. It’s a bit like being a blog writer. Writing the right blog that will please your audience is a matter of luck in the beginning. Being consistently pleasing to your readers requires skill.

I was thinking about the future as I often do. What would life be like if there were spaceships flying around? What would it be like if there as a spaceship from Portland, OR?

I remember going to the airport in Portland. There are five coffee houses in the airport itself. The entire culture of the Northwest is so coffee centered that it is funny. So, I pictured what it would be like if they had a spaceship from Portland. It would probably be shaped like a coffee cup with blinking lights going around and around like a UFO. They could beam people up and down whenever they ran out of creamer or scones. But, what would they say when they needed to be beamed up?

Beam me up Scotty?
No. This is a coffee house spaceship from Portland.
They would say, “Beam me up biscotti! And next time — a little less foam please…”

Tweet:
(1) Beam me up biscotti — a story about a coffee house spaceship from Portland, OR that beams people up when they run out of creamer or scones!

A review of Ogre Burger — Los Angeles, CA

A review of Ogre Burger — Los Angeles, CA

In real life there is no such place as Ogre Burger, but for the sake of entertainment — and Los Angeles is the entertainment capital of the Western world — I will write a review anyway.

Waitress: “Welcome to Ogre Burger, how many I help you?”
Customer: “Well, I wanted to get something to eat. Do you have anything good?”
Waitress: “Honestly nothing made by a bunch of ogres could be that good. A-choo. Oooh, let me get a kleenex out of the large bag that I have slung over my slouched shoulder.”
Customer: “Hmmm, the menu looks interesting. The earthwork puree looks enticing, but I think I’ll stick with the Ogre Burger — au jus!”
Waitress: “An excellent choice.”

(5 minutes later the waitress returns)

Ogre Waitress: “Here is your Ogre Burger, a delicious sandwich on a Kaiser roll with a delightfully malformed burger inside.”
Customer: “My burger seems to have a large protrusion on the right over here.”
Ogre Waitress: “We can remove that… Alex!!!”
Alex: “Scalpel”
Fred: “Scalpel” (deep gravely tone of voice)
Alex: “IV”
Fred: “IV”
Alex: “Lights”
Fred: “Lights”
Alex: “This won’t hurt a bit. It is a routine operation around here with all these ogres. Done!”
Customer: “Wow, look at all of that blood that came out of the dissected deformation!”
Alex: “Yes, well you said you wanted it, au jus!”
Customer: “Right”

(3 minutes later)

Ogre Waitress: “So, how are you liking your Ogre Burger?”
Customer: “Well, it’s Medi-ogre at best.”
Ogre Waitress: “Ha ha, I haven’t heard that before! Here’s a huge club to go with your order.”
Customer: “I didn’t order a 200 pound club with spikes coming out of it.”
Ogre Waitress: “Comes with the territory, after all, we have to live up to the theme of this restaurant.”
Customer: “Good point, is that why you limp around dragging your left foot every step?”
Ogre Waitress: “Something like that. It’s a branding thing!”

(in the back)

Black Ogre #1: “What is it with white ogres, you know what I’m sayin’?
Black Ogre #2: “What happened girl? By the way, we African American Ogres, not Black.. never mind…”
Black Ogre #1: “Girl, I saw this white ogre Melissa trying to dance. Girl… it was so bad. I mean there

should be a rule against people like her dancing. Ogres might be hideous, but at least we can have rhythm. And even though we all have contrived bum left legs, at least we could move our arms around to

the music without looking like a clumsy bunch-a nitwits.”
Black Ogre #2: “I know how you feel, but honestly, what can you expect from a bunch of ogres?”
Black Ogre #1: “And by the way, if a guy ogre is an ogre, what is a girl ogre? An O-Girl?”
Black Ogre #2: “I think we are called ogresses.”
Black Ogre #1: “So, instead of saying — you go ogirl, I have to say, you go-gress?”
Black Ogre #2: “Something like that. You can say whatever you want over here. Nobody cares.”

Ogre Melissa: “So how did you like my dancing to: Don’t You Wish Your Girlfriend Looked Like Me?”
Black Ogre #2: “Let’s just say that Paula over here wasn’t exactly Ogrely enthusiastic about the whole

thing. And of all the songs you could have picked, it should have been – Aren’t you relieved your girlfriend

doesn’t look like me!”
Customer: “Wow, you keep coming and filling my water the minute it gets to the 25% level?”
Ogre Waitress: “Well, we like to think that the glass is a quarter full, and that we should fill it some more!”
Customer: “Well, I must say, even thought the food here is medi-ogre, the service is the best I’ve ever

seen if you overlook the huge two inch diameter growths you all have on your foreheads or chins.”
Ogre Waitress: “We put those on every evening before our shifts to make us look gruesome!”
Customer: “It works. Your boss must spend a lot on their make-up artist.”
Ogre Waitress: “For me he spends a lot, but for the others here, the ogre look comes mostly naturally. They only need a few touch-ups that they do in the basement of the bell-tower to the left. See that mural of

the bell-tower? They go into the dungeon down the stairs to the left over there.
Customer: “I see. May I have my bill?”
Ogre Waitress: “Here you go!”
Customer: “Oh my god, you have claws where your fingernails should be!”
Ogre Waitress: “We are ogres after all.”
Customer: “Well thank you so much. It was a very interesting experience here.”

Meao — a social media site for cats

How come cats don’t have social media sites? Some of the kitties I know are pretty high tech if you ask me! I recently heard of a social media site called Meao. It is for busy cats who are on the go. Here are some interactions on this esteemed new site.

Fluffy is now following you on Meao
Esmerelda sent you a Hiss
Raymond clawed at your last post.
Fluffy growled at your last blog entry.
Tiger Queen says that it’s okay to come into her territory — disregard scent of her urine.
Mr. Spot would like to sniff you

The beauty of Meao, is not only can you read other cat’s posts, but you can transmit scents over the internet. If you want to share a scent with another cat, you can! Maybe the site should be renamed — Instascent.

Considering how anti-social most kitty cats are these days, I think a good social media site might be a nice way for them to come out of their hiding places and interact a little more.

You might also like:

4 places to have ice cream in Los Angeles
http://blog.meander411.com/2014/02/11/ice-cream-in-los-angeles/

Pairing 80’s songs with Thai & Japanese food? Am I crazy?
http://blog.meander411.com/2013/10/30/pairing-80s-songs-with-thai-japanese-food-am-i-crazy/

A new social media site called Dissed!

You know how most social media sites tell you when you get a new follower? They might even email you when someone follows you. Well Dissed is different. Dissed tells you when someone unfollowed you, and gives you the nasty, insulting commentary that goes with it.

If only the Jimmy Fallon show could endorse this concept.
This is just my guess, but Jimmy Fallon’s sense of humor might appreciate a concept such as Dissed. It’s funny in a demented way if you think about it. Americans love to hear about someone who got had, or who got dumped. Nothing pleases us more. So, why not make a site that devotes its entire existance to this concept.

The email message
John joined Dissed a few days ago. He got liked by Cindy. But, then Cindy dissed John! “Dissed!” Here is the email message.

Sorry John, you’ve been dissed.
Cindy no longer likes you and has this comment for you.
“Hi John, it’s nothing personal, but you’re so lame, and boring. How can I possibly follow someone like you on social media?”
Fred: “Dissed — ha ha, I knew she would diss you.”
Sam: “That was cold bro, I can’t believe she dissed you.”

After reading the message
John read the message, and the only thing that went through his head was, what a nasty email. How could Cindy diss me. And what are all these other people’s gossipy commentary doing here? Does the whole world have to know that I got dissed? The answer is, Yes! The whole point of Dissed is to get dissed and have everybody talk about you. The sad thing about Dissed, is that people are already this demented and mean. Dissed doesn’t make them any meaner, it just highlights the worst aspects of humanity and broadcasts it.

John: I don’t want to live anymore. Why is life so cruel?

To make Dissed more fun…
On most social media sites, you can like large quantities of people. They just don’t allow you to like more than a few dozen in a 24 hour period. On Dissed, to keep it interesting, the quantity of people you can follow is limited. However, you and your followers have access to the potentially large database of all the people you’ve dissed. Let’s say you just joined the site. You can like up to twenty people. If you are a regular user, then the site lets you like more people gradually over time. But, to spice things up it would be interesting if the site suddenly made you diss lots of people at once.

Let’s say you had been a regular user on the site for three months, and had accumulated thirty-five followers and had a maximum allowed number of followers also of thirty-five. Then to surprise you, the site told you that you couldn’t post anything until you reduced your number of people you follow down to twenty-five. You’d have to diss ten people at the same time. Boy, what fun. It might be hard to develop a large following on this site with all of the limitations, so the dissed people would still be able to get your posts, they would be a 2nd class type of followers. It’s just an idea. Not sure if would catch on. You never know!

Live is cruel, so join Dissed!

Food & Joke Pairing

Have you heard of wine pairing? I have. Wine pairing is a procedure where a sommelier or wine buff pairs a half glass of wine with a particular dish.

The accompanying wine accentuates or compliments the food that it is with. My best experience was at Campanile on La Brea in Los Angeles. This was a few years ago, so I don’t remember the exact wine. We had the same wine from San Luis Obispo County — but, from three different years! Each year had a completely different character and brought out dramatic new life in the dishes it was paired with. There was a soup, beef in tomato sauce, and grilled pork rib. The way the wine made the tomato sauce interact with my palate was truly an experience. The grilled pork went perfectly with the other wine. And the soup — ah, the soup!

But, what about joke pairing? Nobody has ever heard of this, and probably doesn’t want to.

Friend: “Joke pairing? You must be joking!”
Me: “Well, actually, I’m being serious — I really mean it. You pair jokes with food or wine for entertainment purposes. It is something you might fondly remember years after the fact — (or joke).”

Let’s say, that you have a party, or a restaurant. Most people go to restaurants for the food, or the ambiance. But, few places offer an experience except for a few that hire actors as waiters, and a few Moroccan places that have belly dancers. But, what if you took the same approach as a 60’s style cafe. Perhaps Wednesday might be poetry night, and Thursday could be comedy night. Tuesday you could have amateur song writers sing their new compositions. So, on Thursday, you could have jokes paired with edibles!

If you had a dry joke, you could pair it with a dry wine. Even after the initial fun was over, it would be fun months or years after the fact to continue that bizarre tradition. A dirty joke could be paired with some dirty Mississippi mud cake for example. A musical joke could be paired with a Cabernet that had many subtle notes!

Sample Joke Pairing:
Pair a corny joke with Sopa De Elote: roast corn + smoked chicken + avocado + mostarda + crispy hominy

Where did I think of this idea? I was at a Thai restaurant in Ojai. They kept playing 80’s hits one after the other. I thought that it would be cool to pair 80’s songs with Thai dishes.

“Eye of the Tiger” could be paired with Tiger shrimp. Every time someone ordered that dish, the minute the waiter came out with the finished product, they could play Eye of the Tiger.

“Another one bites the dust” could be paired with a dessert that had been showered with chocolate dust.

I had many other ideas for song and food pairing, and that will be in a separate blog entry!

Pairing 80’s songs with Thai & Japanese food? Am I crazy?

We have all heard of wine pairing — where you pair a wine and a dish that go well together. It is not only delicious, but a fun experience. But, I have never heard of anyone doing song and food pairing. Too bad, it would be a fun novelty at a restaurant. I came upon this idea while sitting at a Thai cafe in Ojai. They were playing 80’s hits one after the other. I was thinking that it would be really funny if you ordered a dish, and the waiter came out with the dish with an accompanying song. The minute he/she emerged from the kitchen, the lights would dim, and the song would play.

Imagine that you ordered extra spicy green curry shrimp and all of a sudden the waiter comes out and you hear “Some Like it Hot” on the sound system. Or, what if you ordered angel wings (wings stuffed with glass noodles) and you hear the song, “Broken Wings”. It would be quite an experience. I had another idea of joke and food pairing where you pair a dry joke with a dry wine, or a dirty joke with Mississippi mud cake.

Another fun idea I had was to have novelty cakes. For acupuncturists cake shaped like an arm with needles in it which would be the candles. For notaries, a cake shaped like a notary seal that was leaking chocolate ink. But, imagine an Indian restaurant that had a rick-shaw cake. My take on this one is that the rick-shaw has an accident, crashes into the dish, and then the customer gets a phone call that sounds like it is from India.

Waiter: “We have a phone call for you about your rick-shaw… I think it is from overseas, you better take it!”
(Static on phone line — weird foreign sounding ring tone)
Call Center Guy: (nasal tone of voice with thick Indian accent) “Hello, Mr. Smith. We regret to inform you that your rick-shaw has met with a terrible accident. You will still be receiving it, but it crashed into a ditch, and the driver was slightly injured.”

The next thing you see is a guy dressed in a tan Indian style rick-shaw outfit with Hindu markings on his forehead who has a noticeable injury on his arms and face. The guy speaks very little English, but says, “Your rick-shaw is here sir” Then, the waiter brings out a rick-shaw cake that fell into a chocolate ditch. The cake is big enough for 6-8 people, and you have to decide who gets to eat the steering wheel! What fun!

Here is my list of 80’s songs and accompanying food. If you own a small cafe, you could have a ton of fun with these ideas!

“Whip it” could be paired with meringue, or deserts with lots of whipped cream.

“Like a Virgin” — Asian food is not high in olive oil, but if it were Asian-Italian fusion, you could pair Like a Virgin with extra virgin olive oil, or a dish that has a lot of it.

“Eye of the Tiger” could be paired with Tiger shrimp. Every time someone ordered that dish, the minute the waiter came out with the finished product, they could play Eye of the Tiger.

“Another one bites the dust” could be paired with a dessert that had been showered with chocolate dust.

“King for a Day” would go well with King Salmon. But, I adapted the song, “Wild Thing”, just in case someone orders “Wild King” Salmon from Whole Foods. The guy at the counter didn’t call it King Salmon… He called it “Wild King.”

“Bang a Gong” could be paired with Tom Yung Goong (spicy shrimp soup)

“Some Like it Hot” would be excellent with Thai or Indian food — almost any dish if ordered extra hot!

“Walking on Sunshine” — perfect if you order eggs sunny side up.

“Like a Virgin” is a great song if someone orders a Margarita with no alcohol.

“Broken Wings” could be paired with Thai chicken wings stuffed with glass noodles (Angel Wings)

“Sweet Dreams are Made of This” would be excellent with any dessert.

“Under Pressure” is perfect for anything cooked in a pressure cooker.

“Turning Japanese” by the Vapors would be good if you have only a handful of Sashimi items on the menu.

“Like a Surgeon” is a good song if you are carving a roast.

“Panama” would be good if you were serving some Central American dishes.

“Rock Lobster” by the B 52’s would be good with some good tail.

“Electric Avenue” might be good if you serve jellyfish (or if your cell phone is out of battery)

“Man-eater” would be a great song at any restaurant that serves humans.

“Purple Rain” might be good if you served ice cream in a raspberry sauce that you dripped on at the table.

“Rock the Casbah” would be perfect if you had only one Moroccan dish on the menu and someone ordered it.

“Raspberry Beret” — great with after dinner berries.

“Na Na Hey Hey”, by Bananarama would be good with Thai Rad Na noodles.

“Doctor Doctor” would not be played when the food arrives. But, if someone reacts poorly to a dish that was too spicy, then this song would come in handy.

“Don’t Worry Be Happy” is a great song to play if the bill is higher than the clients anticipated, or if they argue about the bill.